Self-sabotage can be a major obstacle to personal growth. It's common to want to improve ourselves, but sometimes, we engage in behaviors that hold us back. By recognizing and overcoming self-sabotage, we can unlock our full potential and become the best version of ourselves.
Get to know the signs and how to overcome them in the following article.
What is self-sabotage?
People often do things that prevent them from growing or repeatedly keep them stuck in the same mistakes. This attitude sometimes happens consciously or unconsciously. If you notice this behavior happening repeatedly, it needs to be addressed.
Self-sabotage can be defined as a deliberate act of doing or not doing, harming or hindering one's progress. This condition can cause problems and make it difficult for a person to achieve their goals and objectives.
Psychology Today reports that many people don't realize that they are holding themselves back from achieving their goals and aspirations. Some individuals spend their time struggling against the urge to eat unhealthy food, drink alcohol, gamble, or other temptations that can interfere with their health, relationships, or work.
This sabotage can also be less obvious, where a distorted belief can lead people to underestimate their abilities, suppress their feelings, or throw tantrums at those around them. An example of the manifestation of this behavior would be someone being reluctant to take an opportunity because they feel insecure or inappropriate, even though they have the potential to do well.
Self-sabotage can have many causes, but it is mainly done because one wants to avoid the mental burden of new responsibilities. Sometimes, people also tend to self-sabotage to avoid failure because they are worried about being talked down to or because of a stressful upbringing.
Read more: Manfaat Menulis Jurnal bagi Kesehatan Mental
Signs of self-sabotage
The signs of self-sabotage can vary depending on the context in which each individual experiences it. Broadly speaking, any activity that prevents you from achieving your personal best can be categorized as self-sabotage. Some signs you may be self-sabotaging include:
- Love to procrastinate
- Deliberately avoiding responsibility
- Breaks promises or does not keep commitments
- Underprepared or not preparing as well as possible
- Lack of alignment between desires and actions
- Regularly arriving late to appointments made or important meetings
- Giving up easily
- Too much of a perfectionist
Common examples of self-sabotage include not preparing well for exams or presentations and not completing work promptly. Hence, you rush through it, blaming others when things don't go as planned and always thinking of giving up when faced with a new challenge.
If left unchecked, this self-sabotaging behavior can hinder your achievements at school and work, depriving you of many golden opportunities for growth and shaping you into a pessimistic and defeatist person.
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How to overcome self-sabotage?
The dangers of self-sabotage may not be immediately apparent in the short term, but in the long run, it can lead to regret and make it difficult for you to grow. If you notice that some of your behaviors are self-sabotage, it's best to start breaking the habit.
Some of the ways you can leave this self-sabotaging habit behind include:
- Find out why
Realizing this situation has happened repeatedly it can help you find the behavioral patterns that cause it. Once you know the possible causes of your self-sabotage, you can slowly formulate what actions you need to take to break the habit.
- Stop procrastinate
Putting off work will only make you overwhelmed. It's best to reorganize your schedule at work so you can work calmly without being pressed for time.
- Reduce perfectionist levels and tendencies
Perfectionists risk self-sabotaging themselves by thinking about every detail that has to be just right. Change your thinking that even the smallest progress is still valuable. Instil in yourself that nothing is perfect, but you can still strive for excellence.
If you find it difficult to overcome self-sabotage with the above methods, you should consult a psychologist or psychiatrist. Doctors and psychologists will recommend therapies that are suitable for your condition.
If you need medical advice or consultation, you can either visit a doctor or use the consultation features available in the Ai Care application by downloading the Ai Care application from the App Store or Play Store.
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- dr. Yuliana Inosensia
Psychology Today Staff. Self-Sabotage. Available from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/self-sabotage#
Raypole, C. (2021). How Self-Sabotage Holds You Back. Available from: https://www.healthline.com/health/self-sabotage
Field, B. (2023). Self-Sabotaging: Why Does It Happen. Available from: https://www.verywellmind.com/why-people-self-sabotage-and-how-to-stop-it-5207635
Lebow, H. (2021). Self-Sabotage: Why You Hold Yourself Back. Available from: https://psychcentral.com/blog/overcome-self-sabotage